Domestic violence is not a new story for any one of us, it’s been ages listening about women being abused, beaten, and becoming the victims of domestic violence in our country. The roots of domestic violence have actually got extended in the new society only with the support of patriarchy. Ours is a male-dominated country and community where women have been struggling to achieve equality and freedom.
Women are very tender physically and by nature as well but that doesn’t make them weak in any respect. They are capable of doing everything and in fact, demonstrated the power of their strength and determination as well. But their struggle is still going and cannot say for how long it will go on because ultimately the foundation of our education system and social system has been established to support male dominance, where they have to face, very less or menial struggles as compared to women.
For ages, only males have been given full freedom to choose, act and do whatever they want but when it comes to women they will be scrutinized through the eyes of the whole system to get what they want. There are physical and psychological differences between males and females, boys are encouraged to study and considered to be the future bearer of the family. Whereas, girls are supposed to be confined to domestic infrastructures where they should learn to cook, care for, and bear their family responsibilities.
This whole phenomenon has portrait a weak identity of women in society especially in front of men. I am not saying all men are the same but seeing the existence of domestic violence in our society makes me believe that there is a superiority feeling among men in our country. They believe women are inferior to them and they can treat them any way they want to. Being a husband makes a man believe that he has got full hold over his wife. I also read it somewhere that males with a traumatic childhood often become violent and indulge in domestic violence.
In areas like the slums and rural areas, domestic violence is found to be on the verge, but it is in no way deniable that in urban cities we see no domestic violence. Because it has literally risen to a significant level and in fact, it has become multifaceted, with not only physical violence a part of it, but verbal and emotional abuse and exploitation too. Admittedly the uneducated males have no control over their attitude and behavior and treat women as servants or debris. Women in such homes are very badly treated and dominated.
In cities, I feel life has become a lot more fabricated in terms of relationships. People have become more individualistic, women are trying to cope with their aspirations and dreams to accomplish equality while males feel a sense of insecurity seeing women striving so hard, in such an environment where both the people are aware of their rights and freedom of expression, males cannot blindly dominate the females.
So, they rather indulge in verbal and emotional abuse and exploitation which is another face of violence but a silent one. This type of mental torture kills women internally day by day. Physical wounds can be healed at some point in time but emotional wounds are deeper and take longer to heal. But domestic violence in any form is not at all acceptable!
With the pandemic and eventual lockdown, we have seen a rise in domestic violence. Many men have lost their jobs and work and thus, women have become the direct target to vent out frustrations and anguish. Every day I read in the newspaper about domestic violence and husbands becoming more violent during this time of lockdown. I imagine, how do kids survive in such an atmosphere seeing violence against their mother? Not only the woman but children also suffer a lot when they have a violent father.
I sometimes wonder, it is only us who have created such a foundation for women where they have been suppressed but who has given the right to beat and slap women and make them the target of frustration? Actually, the compassionate and nurturing nature of women has always been misunderstood! They are loving, caring but not weak. It is a woman only who gives a man yet another chance to treat her badly. Why should women tolerate violence in any way, be it inside the home or outside in society, why should she let anyone take her for granted?
It is high time women must stop tolerating the wrong done against them and fight for the right thing. In the end, I just want to add some important things they should follow to feel confident in themselves.
- Never take your education for granted, remember a good education makes you wise!
- Give someone chances to change but draw a line always. You should know where things go beyond.
- Never tolerate violence and abuse. Keep the helpline number always saved it might help you.
- Never let your shine and confidence dim.
- Be informed of your rights and know where you have to use them wisely.
- Don’t hesitate to share and talk about your condition with a close friend or family member and seek out help.
- Try to keep children out of all this, they are the ones who get deeply involved as well as affected by all this.